As for the last question: otherwise, you don't have a critical point and there is nothing to test. :-) Think with one variable: would you look for a maximum or minimum if $f'(x_0) \neq 0$?
Your intuitive understanding of the Hessian points in the right direction. The point is: how to "sum up" all the data $f_{xx}, f_{xy} = f_{yx}, f_{yy}$ in just one single fact?
Well, thinking about the quadratic form that the Hessian defines. Namely,
$$
q(x,y) =
\begin{pmatrix}
x & y
\end{pmatrix}
\begin{pmatrix}
f_{xx} & f_{xy} \\
f_{yx} & f_{yy}
\end{pmatrix}
\begin{pmatrix}
x \\
y
\end{pmatrix}
=
f_{xx}x^2 + 2 f_{xy}xy + f_{yy}y^2 \ .
$$
If this quadratic form is positive-definitive, that is $q(x,y) > 0$ for all $(x,y) \neq (0,0)$, then $f$ has a local minimum at the point where this happens (just as in the one-variable case, $f''(x_0) > 0$ implies $f$ has a local minimum at $x_0$).
It's more or less obvious that for $q(x,y)$ to be positive or not at all points doesn't depend on the coordinate system you're using, isn't it?
Right, then do the following experiment: you have a nice quadratic form like
$$
q(x,y) = x^2 + y^2
$$
which is not ashamed to show clearly that she is positive-definite, is she?
Then, do to her the following linear change of coordinates:
$$
\begin{pmatrix}
x \\ y
\end{pmatrix}
=
\begin{pmatrix}
1 & 1 \\
1 & 0
\end{pmatrix}
\begin{pmatrix}
\overline{x} \\
\overline{y}
\end{pmatrix}
$$
and you'll get
$$
q(\overline{x}, \overline{y}) = 2\overline{x}^2 + 2 \overline{x}\overline{y} + \overline{y}^2 \ .
$$
Is now also clear that $q(\overline{x}, \overline{y}) > 0$ for all $ (\overline{x}, \overline{y}) \neq (0,0)$?
So, we need some device that allows us to show when a symmetric matrix like $H$ will define a positive-definite quadratic form $q(x,y)$, no matter if the fact is disguised because we are using the wrong coordinate system.
One of these devices are the eigenvalues of $H$: if all of them are positive, we know that, maybe after a change of coordinate system, our $q(x,y)$ will have an associate matrix like
$$
\begin{pmatrix}
\lambda & 0 \\
0 & \mu
\end{pmatrix}
$$
with $\lambda, \mu > 0$. Hence, in some coordinate system (and hence, in all of them), our $q > 0$.