(1) Integral is finite.
The function in the integral is $\leq \frac{2}{x+y}$. The integral of $1/(x+y)$ on the square is bounded, because $\frac{1}{x+y} \in [N,N+1)$ for points in the square with $x+y \in [1/(N+1), 1/N]$ is (for large $N$) a trapezoid with height approximately $1/N^2$ and width of approximately $1/N$, for a total contribution to the integral of about $N \times \frac{1}{N^3} (1 + o(1)) \sim \frac{1}{N^2} $. This converges when summed on integer $N \geq n_0$.
(2) Sum converges to the integral.
The sum is a "minimum" Riemann sum for the integral on a partition of the square into $n^2$ equal small. The "maximum" Riemann sum on the same squares except the one containing $(0,0)$ (whose contribution to the sum and to the integral both converge to $0$, and can be ignored) is the same sum for $i,j < n$, plus a small modification along the boundary of the square ($ij=0$ or $i=n$ or $j=n$). These changes to the sum are essentially line integrals of a the function along the sides of the square, weighted by $1/n$, and the modifications go to $0$.
(3) Evaluation of integral.
This can be done using polar coordinates, and maybe by easier methods. I did not work it out, since parts 1+2 already identified what the limit "is" and showed convergence.