I'm not going to answer your question, because I think the comments do a sufficient job in doing so. Instead, I'm going to give you some perspective to thinking about extending math concepts.
When imaginary numbers are taught in schools, they often are taught as follows:
There isn't any number that is the square root of $-1$, right? Well, what if there was? Let's call it $i$.
While I understand why teachers often explain it this way, I think it confuses students. It either makes students view math axioms as voodoo that only experts are allowed to violate, or makes them think that just saying, what if rule $x$ wasn't true. What would math be like?
Don't get me wrong: plenty of interesting mathematical results have come as a result of the second thought process. But the missing piece of context here is "usefulness".
Mathematicians rarely change the axiomatic structure of a functioning system unless there is some necessary functionality they're missing (why change something that isn't broken?), or as @DavidA.Craven points out, if they want to see how far a system can be relaxed while maintaining desirable behavior. With the imaginary numbers, the key issue was not just that $\sqrt{-1}$ didn't have a meaningful interpretation in the reals, but rather, that the reals were not algebraically complete (every polynomial has a root). Thus, by extending the reals properly, mathematicians were able to minimize the amount of axioms violated (when moving from the reals to the complex numbers, you lose a natural sense of order, and you lose the canonical choice of logarithm, among other things), while gaining the benefits of the extension, such as the fundamental theorem of algebra.
From a philosophical standpoint, what you propose is not unsound. But, from a practical perspective, it's not the way we do mathematics. We don't just look at things and say, let's break this rule for the fun of it. Rather, we look at our system, see what things it doesn't do well, and try to understand what axioms are constraining the behavior. Then, we ask, how can we extend our system to one without this axiom (or perhaps with a weaker version of it, or a modified version, etc) that hopefully will resolve the constraint.
In your example of the absolute value, there is no such motivation presented, and no reason to believe there is a way to define an absolute value definition with your constraint that still fits the intuition about absolute value. That doesn't mean there potentially isn't some good use-case for this concept (in fact, norms that can be negative are quite useful), but we definitely wouldn't call it "absolute value"