There is a subtle point, so subtle and confusing, that it is often better to leave it out and let students ask for clarification than to confuse the entire class so early on.
When we do set theory, or really any sort of mathematics, we still work inside a universe. We simply study set theory as an object. This mathematical universe can be "material" (i.e., a larger universe of some set theory) or "syntactic" (i.e., manipulating strings of characters) but it has some kind of understanding of what is induction and recursion. After all, formulas that we use to write down things are often defined by recursion.
The difficulty arises when one is exposed to the fact that the meta-universe may disagree with the universe on the concept of the natural numbers. In other words, given a model of set theory inside a large universe of set theory, the model and the universe may very well disagree about the natural numbers and some of their properties. One thing, however, that we can say, is that the universe's natural numbers will always be represented inside the model, it just that the model can disagree on whether or not these are all of the natural numbers.
The recursion to define $\{x_0,\dots,x_n\}$ is done "externally". In the outside universe, and it will guarantee that there are finite sets of any size that the universe considers finite. Because of more complicated reasons, however, this guarantees that there are in fact finite sets of any finite size internally to the model.
You are correct that the Axiom of Infinity is needed when defining the natural numbers as an internal object, but at the end of the day, we don't actually need it to define the natural numbers as a concept and define by recursion over it, even internally to the universe. It's just that if the Axiom of Infinity is false in a given model, it happens to be that the natural numbers are exhaustive of the entire class of ordinals. This is fine, we can still use induction and recursion even in arithmetic theories such as Peano Arithmetic, and even weaker theories than that (although one has to start being more selective as to what can or cannot be inducted over). It turns out that $\sf ZF$ without the Axiom of Infinity (or rather, with its negation) is "roughly equivalent" to Peano. So in either case, recursion and induction are fine.